LIFE AS HE KNOWS (Chapter 6)

Blog_Life As He Knows ItDele stared with disbelief at the newcomer. He had almost choked on his beer when their eyes met. What the fuck was Tunde doing here?

“Hey, Tunde!” hollered Kola when he spotted his colleague and bustled over to hug him. “Aww, you shouldn’t have,” he said as Tunde, with a shaky smile, handed him the card and bottle of wine. He was still rattled by the sight of Dele on the other side of the room.

“Oh good, there’s someone I want you to meet,” Kola suddenly burst out before shepherding Tunde toward where Dele stood.

Dele watched as the two men approached. He wasn’t sure how to react. He wanted to remain stony and maybe a bit cold, but he also just wanted to pull Tunde in a fierce hug. Since he deleted him online, he had missed him terribly, but his pride had been too hurt for him to reconnect with him. Tunde calling him a fag were words that stung him more than usual, because they came from someone he was falling for, and he had reflexively retreated into his shell.

Kola began once they came close to Dele. “Tunde, meet my brother –”

“Dele,” Tunde said.

“Tunde,” Dele replied a bit curtly. His eyes searched Tunde’s face for something. He wasn’t sure what it was, but something nonetheless. Continue reading

‘It’s Over For you.’ – Tyrese Fires At Comedian who Says He Sucked D**k For Movie Role

TyreseSpankyHayesTyrese Gibson IS not happy about claims comedian Spanky Hayes made about him giving out sexual favours for a film role.

The actor was accused by the relatively unknown comedian of agreeing to get intimate with director John Singleton to land a part in the 2001 urban comedy-drama, Baby Boy.

Spanky, known for his appearance on the Nick Cannon show, Wild ‘N Out, claims he was beaten out of the role by Tyrese after auditioning for John, who allegedly told them: “I fucking love both of you guys, but which one of you guys are gonna suck my cock?'”

It is not yet known if he said it in jest, but the comedian told his listeners: “I had an audition, it was 30 stars there. There were so many stars there that I was like, I don’t fucking belong here. Three weeks later, it was me and another person – now we’re the best two people that’s there. He gets up, he reads, I’m thinking ‘Fuck, I’m not gonna get his.’ Then I get up and I read, and I shock myself.”

“We both sit down and the producer goes, ‘I fucking love both of you guys, both of you are talented. But which one of you guys is gonna suck my cock.” Continue reading

Man Crush Friday: Lynxxx

Lynxxx 08Says a Kitodiariesian:

‘It was about midday and I was bored and hungry. So I decided to go to the cafeteria to get lunch and possibly feed my eyes with some man candy. I got to the cafeteria, ordered my food and settled down to eat. Almost immediately, Lynxxx’s newest song came on the cafeteria TV, and – Damn! – this guy was sexy! That was how Lynxxx succeeded in making me thirsty! God help me if I don’t have him soon.’

Yup, that was Iluvmua. And he’s sharing with us today the visual delight of his man crush. Continue reading

SUITS AND TIES (Part 2)

FOREWORD: Another Kitodiariesian is marking his birthday on the blog, today. He is Xpressive JBoy, and he turns…well, not so old that he can’t still werk it in the bedroom, I think. Lol

Anyway, to commemorate his birthday, he has the offering below. Read and enjoy.

And Happy Birthday, JBoy.

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maxresdefaultSo, it’s me, JBoy, and I’m still employed in this workplace where we’re all supposed to be buttoned up and decked out in our suits and ties. I have colleagues, a number of them, but I do not have friends among them. Well, not until several weeks back.

There was co-worker in another department whose acquaintance I made. Let’s call him Luke. Average looks. Average station. Although there was absolutely nothing average about what he has upstairs. Luke is incredibly intelligent. And I’m sapiosexual, so it didn’t take too much for the walls I erected over my inner self to shake to their foundations when he smiled at me that first afternoon, as he asked to accompany me for lunch break. Lunch together led to more lunches together. And then we exchanged numbers. And then he started dropping in on me at my department. And then I started dropping in on him at his department. And then, we started waiting up for each other at the close of work. And then, we were chatting endlessly on Whatsapp. And then, we were sharing jokes and huddling together in corners, giggling and enjoying the moments we shared together.

#sigh Continue reading

Who Runs The World?

A Kitodiariesian sent this in. And he really, really wants to know. lol

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47909650991095640360noA natural disaster?

Gay people triggered it.

Poverty-stricken countries ruled by corrupt government?

Gay people are behind it.

High rate of divorce because women are now smart enough to know a lying and cheating husband isn’t worth it?

It’s because of gay marriage.

Children becoming a menace in the society because of bad parental training?

Blame gay parents and their kids.

Successful in any field or have a high number of fans in the fashion or music industry?

You have already started practicing homosexuality.

You want to go to heaven?

Stop homosexuality.

You want creative minds?

Consult with gays.

Abeg, na only gay people dey this world? Wetin gay people do una?

I Killed Them…What Is There?

A beautiful outside means nothing if there’s ugly on the inside.

I very recently got engaged in a social media chat with a fine-as-fuck dude on Twitter DM. His name is Stanley Iwezulu. Claims to be a soldier. Young-looking. Well-built. Did I mention he’s good looking? I definitely felt a buzz for him.

But I’m not reckless. So during our chat, I prodded and probed at him, trying to get a feel for his gay disposition, if any. And it wasn’t very long before I got to find out that he was anti-gay. Well, that killed my buzz.

But my curiosity to understand the dynamics of anti-gay individuals kept me on the chat. I wanted to know what his thoughts on the gay issue were. And if the chat was intelligent enough, it might even nudge at my literary creativity. But the chat we had was anything but intelligent. It was poisonous. It was shocking. It was chilling. And it showed me yet again that the ill-will borne against the Nigerian LGBT community isn’t by a faceless, nameless majority, but by real people. Citizens. Individuals. Next-door neighbours. Colleagues. Classroom seatmates.

Or, as is in this case, social media acquaintances. Check out the screengrabbed chat below. Continue reading