RANTINGS OF A RANDOM (Gay) NIGERIAN (Entry 22)

After the US Supreme Court made the landmark decision to legalize gay marriage across the 50 states of America, there were lots of reactions across the world. Nigeria in its true fashion went ballistic, mostly with people condemning the ruling and saying all manner of horrible things about the country. The hate that was spewed online could actually bake a cake. America was called godless, satanic and all, even by people who had applied for American visas several times and would move to America in a heartbeat.

I went on the attack, hacking down any hateful comment that made its way to my timeline on all my social media accounts. I did not care whatever impression these commenters had about me. I just attacked and hacked at every homophobic post that I saw till I got exhausted and realized it was really no use. Just as Khaleesi has often pointed out, homophobia is entwined in the DNA of Nigeria as a nation. So I gave up and resorted to blocking/deleting. If I saw any hateful comment or post, I either unfollowed its owner or blocked him. And by the middle of the day, I had deleted over 12 contacts on BBM alone and was looking forward to a no-negativity internet experience.

‘I Dream Of A Generation…’ – Kenny Badmus

The following is a Facebook post updated by Kenny Badmus. It was so riveting, I simply had to share. Hopefully, there are people amongst us who share in this same dream. Check on it below.

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It’s 4.48 AM here in New York. I just came back home from a long night of clubbing and partying. Or let’s say club hopping. My body is sore from dancing, but I promised myself to write this indescribable experience I had on the train home. Ok, let me try and describe it. I will try.

Four lads got on the train from Times Square. They sat just beside me on the long bench near the door. They were loud but they used no cuss words or profanities. When they referred to each other, they used the word ‘nigger’ or ‘niggy’. They looked like they were in their early 20s. Matching sneakers and shirts. Baseball caps with inscriptions of major leagues and pop artistes. Their pants were below their waistlines. Across the seat from us was a beautiful young lady with a butterfly tattoo on her exposed thigh. She wore just enough dress to cover all the right places but her cleavage.

“Niggy! I ma lick this garl up from head to toe,” one of the lads in the baseball hats said, as he eyed me to get some form of approval.

No Strings With Mike Daemon (Episode 15)

Wondering if it is possible to merge your strong Christian faith with your sexuality? Well, in this episode, Elizabeth Funke Obisanya, an LGBTIQ minister and filmmaker best known for her film Magda’s Lesbian Lover (usually referred to as MLL), talks and deals profoundly with issues concerning faith and sexuality; augmenting it with some of her own personal experiences. She also takes us briefly back into the history of Christianity, Religion and Africa (Nigeria).

To access this episode, click to DOWNLOAD or STREAM LIVE.

Also to support NOSTRINGS, click HERE.

For information concerning Elizabeth’s short film, Magda’s Lesbian Lover, which will be shown at London Arts Festival on the 26 of June 2015, click HERE.

And to submit your LGBTIQ films (short documentaries or narratives) to Elizabeth’s Film festival tagged ‘TADO FILM FESTIVAL’, click HERE.

OPEN LETTER TO MY SON

My dear adorable son, I love you very, very much. My love is without condition and I honestly hope that you’ll forever know that, no matter your age or how stubborn you’ll become, I’ll always love you unconditionally.

A recent incident has prompted me to write this open letter to you, and I do hope I’ll have trained you well enough to read it with an open mind.

While you were barely two years old, I went to a children’s birthday party with you. And feeling like a proud father, I took pictures of us and posted them online. A ‘friend’ saw the picture and gave me a call – two friends actually, but I’ll focus on the first. He said and I quote, “Guy, your son is too fine, way too fine. You better not send him to a boarding school. Send him to a day school, so we don’t get another gay convert. We already have enough gays; we don’t need to add your son as one more.”

That Piece About Gay Sex And Sexual Identity

Originally published on blackgaymensblog.com, with the title ‘Sexuality and Identity: Does Gay Sex Make One Homosexual?’

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Personally, I do not believe that engaging in gay sex once makes a man (or woman) gay. I don’t believe sexuality is that clear cut – it all depends on the circumstances surrounding the sexual encounter. I am not suggesting homosexuality is a choice, but I think engaging in homosexual acts can be.

Let me make one thing clear, I am not talking about repetitive, on-going sexual encounters or referring to those men who might be in denial. I think that any man who has gay sex for a prolonged period of time, or has numerous male sexual partners is at the very least bisexual. Especially, if he does so when he has free access to women and the life of a loved one is not threatened. I think some gay men are too quick to want to label anyone who has had homosexual sex as gay or no longer straight. Sexuality is simply not that black and white – not all sexual encounters define one’s sexuality. The label “gay” is a western concept, and there are societies in which that label doesn’t exist and others where the gender of one’s sexual partners is not as big a deal as it might be here in the USA. In those societies, “gay” is not a political statement, and so I’m trying to look at things more broadly. We don’t have to agree, but we can respect and maybe learn from one another.

That being said, I have a few questions, which might challenge the notion that once a man has had homosexual sex, he is no longer straight:

LAST WORDS

Here I am, writing down my emotions, because I’d rather do that than speak a word about what I’m feeling. Recently I don’t even know what I feel.

I dated a man. He was strong, handsome, unique, interesting. He also had a baby mama, who he says is alright with his bisexuality. I guess she was, until I came into the picture.

He introduced me to her when he and I first started dating. She smiled at me and said hi. She shook my hand, and then we danced together. It was a party, and her friends were there too. They kept staring at me and talking amongst themselves. I wasn’t comfortable with that, being the new boyfriend suffering the distant dissection of my beau’s ex female love interest. But it was a party. So I kept on drinking and dancing.

And then, as I got comfortable in my relationship, she got less comfortable with me being around. There was drama. There was hate. And there were children involved. It broke my heart that she was using their children as a weapon to drive a wedge in between me and my beau. The entire brewing mess affected me in ways I thought wasn’t possible. I wanted the best for my man as much as I wanted him with me, but then I loved the way his eyes shone when he talked about his kids. Before the drama. Before the mess.

‘There’s always been gay people in the black community.’ – Queen Latifah

Society is not accepting enough of gay black people, according to Queen Latifah.

In an interview with Uptown Magazine, the 45-year-old discussed how difficult it is for black gay women, but stopped short of including herself in that category.

The actress and TV host, who is frequently pictured with her rumoured partner Eboni Nichols, has never personally commented on her own sexuality.

“People’s ideas in general are antiquated when it comes to who you love,” she said. “We haven’t moved as quickly as we probably should. And the reality is that there’s always been gay people in the black community, so it’s not foreign to us. And not just as a black community but just a society as a whole.”

‘For All Intents And Purposes, I Am A Woman.’ – Bruce Jenner Says, While Clarifying That He Is Not Gay

Bruce Jenner is explaining his sexuality after revealing to Diane Sawyer that he is transitioning into a woman.

During his exclusive sit-down interview with ABC News, Bruce shared that he is “not gay.”

“I am, as far as I know, heterosexual,” he explained. “As far as I know, I’ve never been with a guy. I’ve always been married, raising kids.”

“And you can desire a woman every bit as much?” Sawyer asked.

“Yah, yah,” he responded.

Sawyer continued, “If you are a male and you become a female, but you like women, are you a lesbian? Are you a heterosexual who…”

But before Sawyer could fill in the blank, the Olympic athlete said, “You’re going back to the sex thing and it’s apples and oranges.”

Kate Winslet’s response to her 7-year-old saying he might be gay

Kate Winslet’s reaction to her son Joe asking whether she would prefer if he was gay or straight, is quite something.

In an interview with V Magazine, the Oscar and Golden Globe winning actress said she was told by her son that one day he “might have a boyfriend”, or a girlfriend.

When asked which she would prefer, she responded amazingly. She said: “It doesn’t make any difference to me.”

Here is Winslet’s full response:

JAMES’ JOURNAL (Entry 34)

April 10

I was listening properly to a song on David Guetta’s ‘Listen’ album. You know how you might hear a song but never really hear it. Well that day, I heard it. The song is Lift Me Up.

We’ve all got our struggles and are just trying to make it home. Some people seem to have their shit figured out, but even then, I’m sure they’ve still got demons to fight. Some people are just better at hiding their demons than others.

I’m often saying how we need to be tolerant of each other, how we need to learn to lift each other up because we are different but still fundamentally the same. It’s beginning to sound like an old tune but I don’t think things can be better with us at each other’s throats, looking for ways to put each other down and undermine our accomplishments and struggles. If you’ve got nothing good to say, then don’t say anything. And if you feel you must point something out, then maybe do it as nicely as possible. Don’t let it seem like the other person didn’t do anything tangible.