OPEN LETTER TO MY SON

My dear adorable son, I love you very, very much. My love is without condition and I honestly hope that you’ll forever know that, no matter your age or how stubborn you’ll become, I’ll always love you unconditionally.

A recent incident has prompted me to write this open letter to you, and I do hope I’ll have trained you well enough to read it with an open mind.

While you were barely two years old, I went to a children’s birthday party with you. And feeling like a proud father, I took pictures of us and posted them online. A ‘friend’ saw the picture and gave me a call – two friends actually, but I’ll focus on the first. He said and I quote, “Guy, your son is too fine, way too fine. You better not send him to a boarding school. Send him to a day school, so we don’t get another gay convert. We already have enough gays; we don’t need to add your son as one more.”

JAMES’ JOURNAL (Entry 37)

May 15

Growing up, I think sex was one of the few uncomplicated things I knew. You were Top, Bottom, or Versatile. It really didn’t matter what you liked because it was all fun for the two parties involved, and if done right, both parties would go home quite content and happy with an afterglow. I bottomed quite happily for people because it was fun. I asked a few times if I could top (disrespectful child), and I was refused. Even by the so-called Versatiles. But oh well… I was a young one and they might have felt uncomfortable or something. I however patiently waited for my university days when, at least, I’d find even some of my age mates that we’d get to flip flop and stuff.

University has however shown me that many more unimportant things have come into defining sexual roles, making things unnecessarily complicated. I can’t even state my role comfortably without being told I should be Bottom and not Versatile. It was just some dude I met and maybe, because I wasn’t edgy or hard enough, he thought it meant I should only get it up the ass. I just smiled sheepishly at that. By the time I’m done dealing with him…

‘I nearly married a famous gay actor before he came out.’ – Jane Fonda

Grace and Frankie star, Jane Fonda has revealed she had real-life experience of her partner coming out as gay.

Jane Fonda and Lily Tomlin  – who previously appeared together in the cult classic, 9 to 5 – star in new Netflix comedy ‘Grace and Frankie’ as two women  left abandoned when their husbands declare their love for each other.

Speaking to PrideSource, the star opened up about her own similar life experience. She said: “When I was young, I was the female that gay guys wanted to try to become heterosexual with. A very famous actor who’s gay – and I will not name names – asked me to marry him. I was very flattered, but I said, ‘Why?’ This was 1964.

What’s On Your Mind… IV

Based on the background information supplied in some KDians’ comments here, I’ve often wondered: Born This Way or Converted This Way?

A number of times on this blog, the issue of whether men are born gay or whether they are turned away from their ‘normal’ heterosexual yearnings and onto the gay path has come up. This is one issue that often twists and turns in my head like a loose bolt.

Some commenters have given instances of straight guys being turned gay after money, jobs or other favours were placed on the table to sweeten the deal. There have been insistences that these guys were totally straight previously and only agreed to be with a man on account of the material inducements.

Hmmm.

No Strings With Mike Daemon (Episode 6)

STAYING HEALTHY AS A HOMOSEXUAL

Homosexuals are commonly tagged as ‘pleasure seekers’ and as a result, many people including homosexuals themselves, perceive homosexuality as a ‘FUN Lifestyle’. But it’s neither fun nor a lifestyle. It’s who we are. And if we don’t get a handle on the choices we are driven to make by our sexuality, there’s a whole lot of deep shit (no pun intended) we might get ourselves into.

Statistics from all around the world show that homosexuals (gay men) are more prone to contracting dangerous sexually-transmitted diseases than people of other orientations. As fact, homosexuals rank the highest number of people living and dying from HIV/AIDS. It is for these reasons that #NOSTRINGS discusses and exposes the common dangerous sexual practices of gay sex, as well as provides knowledge into methods that could help the average homosexual person stay safe and healthy. The discussion balances sexual pleasure and safety as the both are paramount to every human being, homosexuals inclusive.

Jack Falahee Is not Impressed With Questions About His Sexual Orientation

“Yeah, people have been asking me about my sexuality ever since that Out interview. I’m very confident in my sexuality, and I really don’t like talking about my romantic life in the press. It’s pretty reductive to ask just the actor playing the gay character what his sexuality is, if you’re not going to ask that question of people playing straight characters on the show. I really don’t see what my sexuality has to do with the characters, and I think that’s private. But I find it interesting, the fascination with picking apart or outing actors who play homosexual characters on TV or in films. We don’t have that same fascination with actors who are portraying heterosexual characters.”

— How To Get Away With Murder’s Jack Falahee discussing the dichotomy between questions asked actors playing gay and straight characters in an interview with Vulture

BEFORE I DIE: 2 (And He Comes Undone)

Dad doesn’t say a word, at least not immediately. He sits heavily on his bed, then turns and looks at me. The silence is really awkward, and I just have to break it. So I continue speaking.

Me: I went for a test yesterday, and it came back positive.

Dad clears his throat, and finally says something.

Dad: Have you been sleeping with girls?

Me: No.

Dad: Are you a homosexual?

The Unfortunate Case Of Leelah Alcorn

Seventeen years ago in Kings Mills, Ohio, a child was born into the Family of Mr. and Mrs. Alcorn. They named him Joshua. As a young child, Joshua was unusual; he was effeminate and loved to play in girl’s clothing. He loved dolls, long hair and other things that females are normally inclined to. At the age of four, he started feeling like a girl trapped in a boy’s body.

The family attended the Northeast Church of Christ in Cincinnati and Joshua was raised in a strict Christian home and was constantly fed with what most of our parents filled or do still fill us with – several doses of religious doctrines and ample bible texts.

At the age of fourteen, after several years of emotional torture living in the closet, he decided enough was enough, and decided to come out to his parents. He did and got a stern negative reaction from them. He also made it known to them that he wanted to be referred to as ‘she’ and Leelah, not Joshua.

Kenny Badmus Concludes…

It’s been five days since Kenny Badmus ‘broke the internet’ with his coming out post on Facebook. And in that time, there have been both love and hate reactions from different people with access to the internet. The brand expert has acknowledged them all and had something to say to all that on Facebook. Read below:

‘In conclusion, having reviewed all emails, comments, hates and goodwill in the last couple of days, I’m happy to say this is not about us. It’s about the ones who don’t have the platforms to speak. Or the one whose voices have been muffled by the fear of being rejected. The culture of shaming and silence has harmed us as a people, especially in Africa.

And If I Were Straight

I clenched my teeth in anger, feeling the darts of his preaching pierce every part of me. I wanted so badly to scream and shut him up, to tackle him with my own arguments against his (and our collective) religious dogma. A dew of sweat trickled down my armpit, a testament to the uneasiness I felt as I sat on the rug in the mosque, sandwiched between two heavily-bearded and obvious Islamic radicals who nodded in agreement to all the imam was preaching, occasionally whispering “Allahu Akbar” and “Adhusubillahi” respectively to whenever God’s grace and blessings and abominable actions were mentioned by the imam. It was as though that elderly man at the front had me in mind when he chose the topic for the day’s jum’at service sermon.

“THE HORRIBLE ABOMINATION CALLED HOMOSEXUALS…”

My hands intermittently and instinctively clenched into fists, itching so badly to smash the jaws holding the thousand strands of long facial hair on the imam’s chin.

“Homosexuals would on the day of judgement be lined at the very bottom of the pit of hell,” he railed. “Right there, they shall suffer a very great torment, my brothers and sisters in Islam.”