And If I Were Straight

FRAME_INFORMANTS_1.jpg.CROP.rectangle3-largeI clenched my teeth in anger, feeling the darts of his preaching pierce every part of me. I wanted so badly to scream and shut him up, to tackle him with my own arguments against his (and our collective) religious dogma. A dew of sweat trickled down my armpit, a testament to the uneasiness I felt as I sat on the rug in the mosque, sandwiched between two heavily-bearded and obvious Islamic radicals who nodded in agreement to all the imam was preaching, occasionally whispering “Allahu Akbar” and “Adhusubillahi” respectively to whenever God’s grace and blessings and abominable actions were mentioned by the imam. It was as though that elderly man at the front had me in mind when he chose the topic for the day’s jum’at service sermon.

“THE HORRIBLE ABOMINATION CALLED HOMOSEXUALS…”

My hands intermittently and instinctively clenched into fists, itching so badly to smash the jaws holding the thousand strands of long facial hair on the imam’s chin.

“Homosexuals would on the day of judgement be lined at the very bottom of the pit of hell,” he railed. “Right there, they shall suffer a very great torment, my brothers and sisters in Islam.” Continue reading

The Road To Atheism

religion-atheism_110646The mere mention of the word atheism strikes terror in the hearts of men. A stigma so strong, it holds almost equal weight with homosexuality.

So I just got back from work and was tired as fuck, but I decided to write this piece, one which is greatly influenced by the events that took place today.

It was 10 o’clock in the morning and I didn’t have much doing. Scrolling through my phone, I got a ping from a friend of mine, a very close acquaintance. He wanted to know if I’d be travelling home for Christmas, and my reply was that it was still under probability. He then cracked a joke about my parents bringing up the “marriage talk” when I get home. I gave him a ‘lol’ and he went on to say that it’s my biggest fear. I was quick to clear that up. For the record, my biggest fear is “getting old”, yeah I’m vain. I can’t think of anything like old age damaging my pristine, pretty face. The mere thought of it sends a cold chill down my spine.

So I went on to tell him I’m just annoyed about the marriage issue, not scared. And that’s how the long argument started. Continue reading

LOVE AND SEX IN THE CITY (Episode 21)

Blog_Love And Sex In The CityPreviously on Love And Sex In the City. . .

George Emoefe, a blast from Biola’s past steps back into his life, reintroducing himself as a guest to the gang’s Sunday ritual at Biola’s place. (Episode 19 & Episode 20)

*

Paschal turned to George and said with a bright smile, “Well, look who’s here! George Emoefe, what, in the devil’s nuts, are you doing back here, away from Sunday School?”

George smiled at him, a tad self consciously, and said, “Well, Sunday School is long over. So it’s safe to say that I did not cut class to come hang with you guys.”

A few chuckles broke out in the room as Biola said, “I saw him the day before yesterday at Obalende, on my way back home from work, and we got talking” – he lifted his shoulders in a careless shrug – “and so, I asked him if he would love to hang with us today.”

“And you said yes?” Ekene said dramatically, his widened eyes trained on George. “You said yes to hanging with poor sinners like us?” The smile on his face took the sting off his words.

George gave a small laugh. “Oh come on…” he started.

“Oh, have you backslidden?” Paschal interjected with a smirk. Continue reading

Pastor’s ‘Biblical’ Solution To Homosexuality Is Mass Killings

pastorOn the website of Pastor Steven Anderson’s church, the Faithful Word Baptist Church in Tempe, you’d find him boasting about the fact that he “holds no college degree but has well over 140 chapters of the bible memorized word-for-word, including approximately half of the New Testament.”

And where has this blind rote memorization with absolutely zero cognitive thinking skills led him? Why, to the cure for AIDS of course!

Not only does Pastor Anderson hold the key to curing AIDS in the evolutionary disabled organ he calls his brain, but he thinks he could do away with the disease by Christmas. Continue reading

HOLY FUCK

g-stay5“Let us pray,” he said, in the darkness of his room that had the silver strings of moonlight peeping through the openings of his curtains.

His request for bedtime prayers wouldn’t have been awkward at all; not in anyway. In fact, morning and night prayers were regular where I came from. But this was different; he’d just been moaning and begging me not to stop when I had his dick in my mouth some seconds ago.

Of course I didn’t protest and he went ahead with his prayer. And then he got to that part, that part we always say to get rid of the guilt of the day. “…Lord, anyway we have sinned against you today, please forgive us.” At that point, I imagine God doing the face palm and rolling His eyes at our request for forgiveness. Yeah right, I imagined him saying. Continue reading

‘We Follow a Jesus I Do Not Recognize.’ Rev. Colin Coward in a Facebook Rant

colin-coward-the-independentThe Rev. Colin Coward, MBE, director of Changing Attitude England, recently wrote on Facebook about his displeasure with homophobia in Africa and the distortion of Christianity by those who are anti-homosexuality. Read below.

‘I feel incredibly angry today. I’ve been chatting for the last hour and a half with a gay Nigerian friend, a quiet, thoughtful, stable young man who allowed himself to trust a ‘friend’ who invited him to a café this morning. It was entrapment. They went to a place that was more rooming house than café which was a set-up, finding himself in a room where other guys were waiting to assault him. He has been attacked, threatened with a machete, kicked and punched, burnt with cigarettes, forcibly stripped naked, clothes torn, photos and a video taken, beaten, and those in the room were joined by guys he had seen playing football earlier.

‘He is a Christian and those assaulting him were Christians. He feels suicidal now, fears the police and further exposure, can’t seek medical treatment, is in deep pain physical and emotional.

‘Assaults like this against LGBTI people are a daily event in Nigeria and other homophobic African countries. I am seethingly angry at the distortion of Christian teaching that encourages and supports the abuse of LGBTI people. Continue reading

AND THEN HE SAID TO ME…

singles 2We went to the same university, my paternal cousin and I. He was a couple of classes ahead of me, older, of course, than me, and treated me with the avuncular affection of a big brother to a younger one. He always gave me money and provisions whenever mine had depleted, and frequently asked me over to his place for sleepovers. He is tall, dark and handsome, and there were moments then, when I nursed a crush on him.

He graduated from school before me, and it wasn’t long before he relocated to the UK to further his studies. We kept in touch, and he continued to look out for me. A year or two after he left Nigeria, he apparently found his calling as a clergyman, and was soon ordained an Anglican priest.

For some illogical reason, I felt as though he had betrayed me.

This was around the period I’d just started getting disillusioned with my faith and the church. I had battled for so long to accept my sexuality, only to suddenly find myself facing the self-righteous indignation of the church. Disapprobation against homosexuality were starting to salt the teachings in my church, with priest after white-garmented priest standing at the altar and shaking his fist in condemnation of the ‘sin’ of man sleeping with his fellow man, and woman sleeping with her fellow woman. I refused to feel guilty about my desires. I refused to be torn up over my libidinous choices. And so, when it came down to a choice of the church and my sexuality, I found myself resenting the compulsory Sunday morning routines and sulking in the face of the crucifix that frowned down at me from the pulpit with sorrow-faced patronization.  Continue reading

That Piece About How To Be Queer In Your Church

gay-christian-500x380Written by Derrick Clifton, originally published in thoughtcatalog.com

It’s not easy being a religious queer person.

It’s even harder while part of a congregation that spews homophobia in pulpits and prevents LGBT people from attaining positions of leadership. Other churches go as far to deny sacraments like communion or other religious rites because of what they deem as “deviant” and “ungodly” lifestyles. And for those called to ministry, the roadblocks are plenty.

Though, in my own experience of reconciling my faith and sexuality, it took time for me to understand my own sense of spirituality. When I first came to terms with my identity as a gay man, there was hardly a night that I wasn’t anxious about how it may impact my faith beliefs and how I engaged church. So, in a quest to find answers, I rummaged dozens of websites and covertly found books in libraries to try and make sense of things.

Perhaps the most liberating aspect of that journey was that I found a new freedom — a freedom to explore my spirituality.

For the first time in my young life, I had to break free from being completely dependent on church sermons and ministers. And it wasn’t an easy process. In fact, it took years before I felt spiritually healthy and it’s still a work in progress. Continue reading

The LGBT response to Archbishop Kaigama’s turnaround

PicturesNigerian Archbishop Ignatius Kaigama recently made a remarkable about-turn on Nigeria’s anti-gay law, saying that he does not support jailing gay people, this after he, earlier this year, and on behalf of the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of Nigeria, congratulated President Goodluck Jonathan for signing the draconian bill into law. At the time, Kaigama, wrote to Jonathan that his approval of the law “is indeed a courageous one” and “a right step in the right direction.”

It now appears that a visit to the Vatican has cleared Kaigama’s head and helped him realise that the Catholic Church is actually opposed to locking up gay people.

Following his insistence that the media’s reporting of his views was a “gross misinterpretation” and that he only supported the parts of the Nigerian law that banned same-sex marriage, Davis Mac-Iyalla, a Nigerian LGBT activist, responded to the archbishop’s hypocrisy, noting that, “there was and continues to be wide-spread violent attacks against those suspected of being homosexuals in Nigeria. Indeed, the persecution of gay people in Nigeria is strongly influenced by religious homophobia.” Continue reading

Ten Things The Christian Learned About Gay People in Ten Years (Part 2)

7c623122Jesus talked about equality a lot; it made the powerful quite uncomfortable.

Written by Kathy, and originally published on canyonwalkerconnections.com

6. ASKING GAY PEOPLE TO DENY THEIR NATURAL SEXUAL ORIENTATION IS DESTRUCTIVE. Recall, homosexual orientation is no more a “behavior” than is heterosexual attraction.  Both are orientations, innate attractions. Reparative therapy (Exodus-type programs that offer results that take away “unwanted sexual attractions” or allude to a gay-to-straight conversion) treats homosexuality as if it were a “behavior” akin to other life choices like drug and alcohol usage, adultery, cheating and lying.

You would expect that the elimination of bad behaviors would result in life benefits.  However, if you force a gay person to “not be gay,” loneliness, depression, isolation and shame can result.

Some gay people do make a choice to live celibate lives.  This is called “Side B” for gay Christians; they come to a personal conviction that God is calling them to be celibate. This is not the same as the imposition of celibacy by an outsider for acceptance before God. Celibacy does not take away attraction; it only means a person is not engaging in sex. A celibate straight person is not “no longer straight” simply because they are not being sexual.  Likewise, a celibate gay person is not “no longer gay” simply because they are not being sexual. Continue reading