JAMES’ JOURNAL (Entry 22)

Blog_KD JournalDecember 4

I’ve got a long list of ex lovers. They’ll tell you I’m insane.

Taylor, you get me so well. My list isn’t as long as yours though. But I still love you.

Anyhoo…I’ve got my phone back and all is right with the world once again. I do hope it doesn’t fuck me up anytime soon again.

I have decided to sing during my faculty week that’s coming up in the next two weeks. I be nervous as hell, but I think it’s time I allowed myself perform in front of a small crowd. I’m not extremely good with the guitar, because I consider my voice my main instrument, but even then, I know people that are waaaay better than me in singing. I was in Port Harcourt recently (don’t ask what I went to do there) and I visited a karaoke bar, and this guy sang three songs and did fabulously well. The bar gave him an ovation and it just made me feel like my voice was bland and boring. Nonetheless, I sang a couple of songs and though it wasn’t exactly a hit, I held my own down.

The kind if singer I hope to be is one that can channel emotion through his voice. Make people feel happy or sad or melancholy and whatnot. Not just someone who can sing and knows how to do riffs and runs. Songs that are memorable to me are those that can channel their emotions to me and I can feel or at least understand what the singer is feeling.

I’ve picked the songs I’d like to sing – Amnesia by Five Seconds Of Summer, and Stardust by Mikka. I can connect to these songs on an emotional level and they seem relatively easy. I’ve done covers of them and people liked them. Maybe if anyone is interested in hearing, they could drop their email addresses with Pinky and I’ll send the file across. But singing a song into a recorder and actually singing to a crowd are two different things. Well… wish me luck and I hope I don’t choke.

Online shopping can be addictive. My mum is out of the country and I’ve been shipping things to her to bring back home for me. I won’t be surprised if my parents cut down my pocket money or I get an interrogation on where I’m getting my money from. I won’t put it past my mum to ask, “I hope it’s not that you are doing that thing and they are giving you money for it,” and I will give her my best innocent look and say, “What thing?” Then skip merrily away with my new found property.

I prefer to buy gadgets over clothes. I have only three pairs of footwear. One for when I want to be cooperate, a pair of All Stars (probably fake), and a pair of fabulous rubber slippers that look like leather (I call them my fabulous slippers). I don’t get people that have more than five pairs of shoes, especially when they use their money to buy them. What is wrong with you people!!!

I be keeping meh hair in a ‘fro and people love it! Me sef, I love it. I’m not one to care about looks (ain’t nobody got time for that!) But once in a while I find a look I like and I stick to it.

One night, I lay up wondering whether secrets are good for a relationship. Like things from one’s past. I think it can be good. As much as it’s great to know all about a person, there’s the slight chance it would get boring, right? But then again, there are some things that shouldn’t be kept from your partner. So I figured it’s just one of those things where moderation comes in. Some things should not necessarily be said. A friend (*coughs*) told me of how he spent the weekend with his boyfriend in a friend’s lovely house. Some weeks later, the boyfriend sort of offhandedly mentioned that he and that friend had shagged many times, and my friend just felt really awkward about it. It might be a bit silly… but I totally see myself in my friend’s shoes. (*coughs again*)

I stop typing here. Reward yourself with a cookie if you read this and didn’t fall asleep. Buh bye.

Written by James