44 thoughts on “Photo: A Message Of Goodwill

    • Cause sometimes you know you’re the only person who can pleasure you the way you want and you just want to be selfish like that.

      Cause sometimes there’s no time to arrange for a hookup.

      Cause sometimes there even isn’t anyone to call or anyone you actually want to share your bed with but you’s still horny.

      Cause sometimes you see porn and all the banging (metaphorically and literally) bodies and the only way you can participate is to jerk off.

      Cause sometimes.. Boredom.

      Cause sometimes you tryna be celibate but konji is still a bitch.

      Cause sometimes you’re tempted to call that ex and you know after the sex it will be a walk of shame from either party or an awkward moment where one of you wants to cuddle.

      Cause sometimes you cum too quick and a quick fix is to wank before a hookup so you’d last longer but that one gets its own risk as it could just drain your libido

      Cause wanking, if done with that purpose in mind, is a way to know your body so you can last for the power bottoms thag want you to keep pounding them for up to an hour.

      Cause it facilitates sleep and a much more fun way to cure headaches and is a stress reliever especially in times when a hookup is not available/wise

      Cause…… Why not!

      So so many reasons to wank. And as long as you know it’s not an addiction/messing up your regular sex life then stroke away… Also try not to wank till it reaches the aforementioned points of addiction et al.

      This message was brought to you by the head of information for the wankers’ association.

    • Its not always very easy to find (the kind of) people (that u want) to fuck,at d time u need them…and sometimes d tin go jus hol’ u bad,bad. Hehe…

  1. Well, the decision can’t be that hard, with that pix up there…*zooms into the pix and reaches for baby oil* hehe…

  2. I got 99 problems.. This is definitely one of them. πŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆ

    Not an addict……

    I think! πŸ’

      • Aunty pinky Pls deliver my message to McGray naa.. I tot you had your own boo.. Don’t be cock blocking bikonu. #PunIntended before you come with your claws.

      • Oh I’m sorry. I suddenly remembered that after the debacle that was you and Sinnex, I swore off matchmaking duties. That swearing-off still stands. This middleman shop is closed.

    • Una don see am bah? Pinky don hijack my msg ooo. Pinky ah iswearigawd, ah go swear for u if u no give me my msg. Inukwanu m akuko?

      • What stops you from dropping your email here? To open a mail address doesn’t take more than 5 minutes. At least I remember seeing a mail address from one ‘Port Harcourt boy’ sometime ago.

        What KD has joined together, let no PP put assunder.

  3. There’s a teenaged boy in my house who wanks like its a religion. Morning afternoon & night. And often in between. He wakes up at midnight to wank. One day I was walking past his room when I heard wet sounds like elephants wrestling. I tip toed and peeped. It was the sound of him furiously trying to strangle his elephant sized prick. I stared aghast. He was moaning obliviously in helpless delirium. I spanked his naked bumbum and said Hian! U go just die on top this endless wanking. He looked at me sheepishly and said sorry uncle, his oiled glistening penis nodding at me, still rock hard. I looked back at the quiet corridor, smiled and closed the door behind us…

    • U closed d door behind u and……………. (the kain thunder wey go blast u still dey do press up if u no finish wat u started)

      • …err, ok McGray. Where do I continuu (pensively puts one greasy finger in mouth while resting 2nd hand on WankerOfLife’s oiled up bumbum…)

        All I can say is that all those pipu saying wanking is not as good as the real thing, haven’t met this boi yet. He’s possessed. Watch him wank at your own peril.

    • By teenager you mean he’s 18/19 right? Your boy needs deliverance.. And a therapy. You should probably introduce the boy to me. So I can give him some much needed help.

      • Tef I have given him ur numba. If u get any message with a elephant sized kundu photo attached, that’s my small boi. Deliver him.

  4. My ideal wanking routine these days is chatting with d hubby and he sends a pic of his penis, and i send a pic of my u-know-what. And he says he’ll like to bla bla bla, so i reach down and stroke myself and well…thats that.

  5. Wanking for me is like an appetizer, like an entre’ that leaves me wanting so much more which is why I do not bother.

    All you need to do is reach out to BBM or whatsapp and less than 2 hours later someone is on his way to yours or you are hitting the road at 120km/hr.

    Wanking is so last season biko when the real thing is available readilyπŸ˜‡

  6. Wanking can b boring…but it’s good mostimes , it can save u from a lot of problems, like fuckin d wrong person, avoiding a possible kito experience, nd lowering yr chances of getting STDs, bcos d rate at which STDs r spreading among guys diz days is alarming, esp here in lag, using condom is not even dt safe. Bad tin is don’t get addicted to wanking.

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