This One Is For The Power Bottoms

tumblr_n3vrx0q4cf1t477oao1_500Titled ‘Bottoms Considered More Promiscuous than Tops?’, this piece was originally published on gayguys.com. It’s quite a read. Check on it below and share your thoughts.

*

I’ve always believed that bottoms have more fun. We’re able to tease, please and squeeze our way into sexual situations necessary for us to be a part of. After all, if there isn’t a man willing to bend over backwards, penetration is out of the question. That in itself gives us power, but have the bottoms of the world taken it to another level?

Power bottoms are everywhere. We’re hiding in the corners and dancing in the middle of the floor as soon as you enter a gay club. To an onlooker, it seems like we’re eager and hungry to please the first hot man we see. This is true most of the time, hell, I was one of them. But this is where our power lies. Because we know how wanted we are, it allows us to expand our horizons to any place we choose.

As someone who’s called himself every kind of label in the book, I speak from experience. Bottoming is not for the weak. It takes a lot of mind power to find a place where you’re truly relaxed – a mental space required to embrace the sensations. Though there are plenty of men who’ve come out of the closet a bottom, for me, it was a much slower progression. Since I’ve experienced both sides I can truly say that bottoms have much more opportunities than their counterparts, but are we using it to our advantage?

The truth is promiscuity lies within the person, not their sexual position. Classifying yourself as a “total” anything requires a pretty heavy stance reflective of your experiences. Until you’ve tried it multiple times, there should be no reason why it should be blocked completely. But for us bottoms who are a necessity in the gay sex world, is the label itself becoming a turn on?

Most of the time, bottoms don’t need to seek out sex. Guys are drawn to us like a moth to a flame. As soon as a man sees an opportunity, instinct comes into play and they begin the game. Go to the dance club and see for yourself, or better yet change the preference on your Grindr or online dating profile to “Power Bottom” and see how many more messages you receive. Trust me, when a man senses a willing bottom, his penis tends to do the picking.

With so many opportunities for a bottom to explore, promiscuity has the potential of becoming a part of our normal routine. In gay culture especially, sex is everywhere. Not just in the bedroom or in the clubs, but in our magazines, posters, TV shows and billboards. A natural reaction for the world is to assume all gay guys are promiscuous. Though for a vast majority it might reign true, there are still plenty of guys who are placed in a bubble of assumptions. If they’re bottoms, they face a whole lot more.

For whatever reason, the world sees bottoms as more sex-hungry than tops or versa tiles and it’s time to start asking ourselves why. Why is it we’re considered sluts when we’re constantly getting played by horny tops looking to get in our jocks? Perhaps it’s time to look in the mirror from both sides. Just because we’re the ones who have to bend over doesn’t mean we’re the ones seeking it, though I admit, top-teasing comes in handy sometimes.

Personally I love the power being a bottom gives me and I use it well to my advantage. Does that make me promiscuous? Maybe so, but one thing is for sure… I always get my way.

84 thoughts on “This One Is For The Power Bottoms

  1. You always have your well…..

    Bottoms are seen as promiscuous just because they are on the receiving end of sex. They are the ones who have to bend. But this is already a stereotyped idea. Tops too are very flirty and promiscuous, especially when they know that they are handsome and very well built. In the end, it all lies and depends on the individual.

    But what I feel is that, bottoms just have a large number of admirers. That doesn’t make them promiscuous.

  2. And here I was thinking tops were the more promiscuous ones… But seriously though.. Isn’t it possible that constant sex would sort of loosen the hole down there to a point where unless it’s a thick dick you can’t feel much. I had an experience with someone who had been bottoming for a while.. Let’s just say it wasn’t much fun. Could I get educated on this please.. Cause I feel if you bottom you shouldn’t be too promiscuous so as to prevent loss of muscle tone down there.

  3. 1. Bottoming is not for the faint hearted! Chineke! The pain eh? Phew! I always admire any man who is a bottom, because surrendering the essence of yourself to another man (with attendant pain and pleasure yes) is no stroll in shoprite.

    2. I dont believe in labels, so classifying yourself as total anything is a fallacy TO ME. However, life is about doing what makes you happy abi?

    3. First of all I dont believe in the concept of promiscuity! Sex is not a bad thing or a thing to be ashamed of. Sex is perfectly normal and a part of our existence as humans so we should not shame those who have a hearty appetite for it, simply because you are not getting enough.

    Now the idea of who is more promiscous (i hate that word) is just a stereotypical nonsense. These things are not defined by sexual roles and gender expectations that come with these obnoxious labels!

    • Dennis, what is this…”essence” of himself a bottom surrenders to another man?

      *applying moisturiser on my elbows*

    • @Dennis, “healthy dose of sex” is what hoes use to defend themselves. Too much of everything is bad.

    • Dennis, I don’t really understand what u mean by “you don’t believe in the concept of promiscuity”. Does that mean that ur response to a person remains unchanged, no matter how promiscuos they are perceived to be? If I remember correctly,u once spoke of a nice dude that u were looking to start something with, but then u curved him when u realised that he had slept with 4 ppl u know, cos u “didn’t want to be that guy who dates the guy that sleeps around”(or something like that.

      • Chesty, please don’t bring in the past into the present. The guy that was dumped because he sleeps around is in the past. The phrase used was “sleeping around” and not the word promiscuous. In the convenient dictionary promiscuous and sleeping around means different things, please

      • @Gad, you ve just spoken a language that your in laws does not understand (in Peter Edochie’s voice). I have just checked my own “convenient dictionary” and sleeping around and promiscuous seems to mean the same thing . I hope they let you get away with this 🙂 because am sniffing sarcasm or ve i just miscomprehend your remark, am waiting to be schooled by you on this.

  4. As for the article: LMAO! What is this, “Ode to the Power Battom”?

    What has the guy said now, eh?

    So I should sit down and start asking myself why “the world” thinks Battoms are more sex-hungry than Taaps. You go fear project topic na!

    Looooool.

  5. I thought power bottom was a dominant bottom.. Not a promiscuous one?

    Promiscuity is down to an individual and has absolutely nothing to do with whatever sex role one decides to play.

  6. This told a few truths but still spooked me out.

    For F’ing out loud, promiscuity is a thing of the mind and has nothing to do with one’s role.

  7. The writer of this article is delusional. Sure guys may crave sex from just about any avenue that available, but I dont see guys chasing after power bottoms.

    Y would u want to get down with something thats as wide as basin (and from which u feel little or no sensation), when there tyt supple butts around for the taking.

    No guys likes to imagine that his btm has been plowed by hundreds of pricks (dildos, cucumber, fists, leg…lol). Power bottoms lack sex appeal jare. Tops only go for them cos they know they are ALWAYS willing and available to be smashed!

    • Lol. Well,in a sense, power-bottoms might be more desirable to tops (albeit temporarily and just for sex) because:
      1)Tops know they are always willing and ready; no forming or resistance
      2)They can take it like a vagina during the actual act; u won’t hear “wait, wait wait…stop for a second…gently pls…wait…don’t go so deep,ouch…slow down pls…” Rather,they be like: “faster…harder…deeper…do it anyway u want!!!”. Lol

  8. I hate d fact dat tops call btms promiscuous,for gods sake,who does d btm sleep with if nt tops. Promiscuity is a word I hate ascribed to btms…happy birthday Masked Man

    • Actually bottoms regard tops as the promiscuous lot. Tops are automatically programmed to pay extra attention to a guy once the ascertain that the guy has a preference for bottoming. Bottoms on the other hand ve a large array of tops to choose from since there is hardly shortage of admirers or sex partners. Then again, word on the street has it that there is stort supply of tops. This may explain why tops go on all you can eat buffet and bottoms stock up on all the tops they can get their hands on. At the end of the day, we are all a huge pile of promiscuity as a whole, but different as individuals.

      Forgive me for asking, is the definition of power bottom=bottoms who ve holes the size of the moon and are always dick hungry 24/7? I don’t know but I think some of y’all are going overboard with ur definition/discriptions. Please feel free to enlighten me on the concept

      • @Peak, a power bottom dude is simply a guy that can take penetration conveniently, comfortably and with longevity. It has nothing to do with promiscuity at all. A THOT, a hoe , a slag, a slut , a ‘animashaun’ or a freedom’s ark is just anyone who sleeps around with reckless abandon. A Bottom or a Top who does this can be address as such, am i reaching out to somebody….

      • Cheers Pp; how was your day though?
        more grease to your elboe and fingers
        thatbis foing the typing and your eyelids
        that are busy scrutinising…..

  9. Since you guys are still categorizing people into roles, lemme add few of my own
    Verse top
    Verse bottom
    Bottom verse
    Top verse
    Top bottom
    Bottom top
    Power top
    Weak bottom
    Weak top
    Etc
    Whoever wrote this, well.. Lemme just smile and keep mute.
    Whether you’re the screwer or the screwee, you all can be hoes. Its just like calling women sluts while leaving men feeling like boss when they smash. A hoe is a hoe, doesn’t matter how you like it in sex.

  10. Promiscuity is the practice of having casual sex frequently with different partners or being indiscriminate in the choice of sexual partners – Wikipedia

    characterized by or involving indiscriminate mingling or association, especially having sexual relations with a number of partners on a casual basis – Dictioniary.com

    Applies to both tops & bottoms

    Quick Question! Say you have a signigficant body count, but they were all more than just causal relations? Are you still promiscuous???

    • D-boy my heart jumped up and clapped for you after reading this. Patiently waiting for the “Hoe ordainer” to answer the question in the last paragraph.

    • In your last paragraph, you’re referring to the “serial dater”. A serial dater has psychopathic tendencies if you must know. If you lack the ability to stick to one person for a while, it means you’re emotionally unable to sustain a happy relationship, and that’s a problem.
      And some people confuse lust/infatuation for love, so honey, if you think you have feelings for them and its not love, then its something else. In my book, you’re still a hoe. A dangerous one at that who manages to delude themselves into thinking that they have feelings for all those who they’ve been whoring around with. You can only love so many people in a single lifetime. The older you grow, the lesser chance you have at likely falling in love.
      So does that answer your question?
      And Mr Peak, I saw what you did there, continue. I’ll soon treat your fuck up.
      A quick question Peak, how many times have you been in love?

      • I can see Max is taking all of these alittle personal.. You might need to calm your titties!

        Tho I think I fall in the ‘serial dater’ category.. I have a problem in the facts that I can’t sustain a relationship for a long time.

    • ÑO! My question nor the one asked by D-boy didn’t get an appropriate Answer. You completely went OFF the road as far as I’m concerned.
      “Say you have a signigficant body count, but they were all more than just causal relations”.
      The above is the key sentence that you should ve focused on. Lets break it down into phrases.
      “Significant body count”
      “More than casual relations”

      Its possible to accumulate a significant body count over the years, with every or almost all of them meaning more than casual exchange of body fluids. There are men who are hopeless romantics, and function better when they are in a relationahip. Some started way early and can swear that those relations meant a great deal if you try to knock it off as a case of kids just play curious. Now the average life span of gay relationships in naija gaybourhood is 3-6 months. Some men can be in more that two relationships in a year. I know of someone who was in a relationship in the space of 3months then decided to fall back and chill since relationships is not working at the moment. Multiply this number by the number of active years, and you would ve urself some serious figures. I’m sure u would be quick to label ppl like that as “serial daters”?

      You are welcome to take another shot at answering the question(if u like)

      The bit about if I ve ever been inlove?
      Ummm I sure you ve the answer to that question b4 now.

      This ur book of hoes though!!!!!!! I’m sure if u walk in on me and my great great grand uncle (who ever he is ) sharing a hug behind closed door, we would still be labeled as hoes. **sigh** I guess we live in a hoe’s world.

      • The original question never involved “years”.. It didn’t.
        Having sex with more than 3 people in a year officially qualifies you as a hoe. **looks around and ready to tear anyone who would dare to challenge this apart** increase the number per year and you have your self a silver , golden or platinum slut. There are cheap hoes and regular hoes etc. Your partners will surely accumulate over the years, but the frequency of sex(with different people) is what differenciates a hoe from a non hoe.

  11. Teflondon, you are a serial dater abi? You can’t sustain a relationship for a day, abi? Yet you are eyeing Gad. This Gad that is sweet, innocent and lovable. Run far away biko.

  12. Being promiscuous has nothing to do with role and everything to do with mindset but the truth is that most tops actually believe bottoms are promiscuous. That’s very stereotypical. I’m speaking from experience. We the younger ones suffer it more.

  13. It’s funny how some of us are ready to police other gay men’s bodies and expressions of their sexuality. Like I mentioned above, some of us don’t deserve acceptance.

    This promiscuity shame is a consequence of Christianity and Islam. I believe in monogamy – I think it’s the most respectful association between lovers. However anyone is within their rights to fuck anyone as long as they are consenting adults.

    Max’s rule is wrong. If you want 3 or 10 a year go ahead! Just take care of your body.

    @James, if the bottom takes proper steps before sex and does the necessary aftercare there is no reason his ass should slacken.

  14. Bottoms tend to be more promiscuous than tops? That’s new to me. I’ve always thought it was the other way round.

  15. Bottoms are seen as promiscous simply because we are on the receiving end.
    If a bottom has sex with a lot of people, he is termed a Slut.
    But if a top has sex with an equal number of partners, he is termed a Man.
    The stereotypes are just annoying because as far as I’m concerned : I’m a slut for sleeping with many partners thus the top is a slut as well for sleeping with as many partners.

  16. Nowadays, there is also the fear that if you are a bottom, you are less than the other gay man. So most tops or verse are either looking for a verse guy or a verse top or a TOP(because some who claim to be tops are actually dick lovers) who is extremely masculine(this I detest so much). All of these “preferences stemming from the fact that all the gays who are bottoms are either power bottoms that are too slutty or too feminine(another I hate). It just really bothers me that with all the work bottoms put into giving pleasure, they have too be stigmatized by tops or really masc bottoms who think they aren’t men enough. #FixItJesus.

    I am noting, however, that there are some bottoms who consider themselves ‘power bottoms’, and can go around the neighborhood and not feel satisfied. Biko, how us that possible? The Konji strong like that?

  17. ….and here I was, thinking that Power Bottom were those who are extremely muscular and manly and also love taking the D. I never knew they were guys who screw alot. As in sluts.

    Anyway, I am confused, why is it that when straight guys bring up the issue of gay guys using pampers because of anal leakage, the gay guys are quick to counter it; yet, I have heard stories of young guys who were ‘coverted’ by older guys and nobody knew about it until they fell ill and started leaking through their anus.
    Besides, what dOes a virgin like me know about sex and sexual related activities. The hoes, whores and akuna akuna in the house have done justice to the piece.

  18. I dont get why some people say bottoms are more promiscuous, i v met randy tops and randy bottoms. Promiscuity is of the person and not of his sexual role. I dont like to attach too much importance to labels, if am sexually attracyed to you, then we are going to have sex if the chemistry is right – I’ll do whatever needs to be done (top you or bottom for you) in order for us to have fun … thats about the end of the matter for me …

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s