RANTINGS OF A RANDOM (Gay) NIGERIAN (Entry 11)

Blog_Rantings Of A Random (GAY) NigerianBen: Dennis baby

Me: Excuse me?

Ben: Dennis baby

Me: Since when did that one start?

Ben: Rest please, not like this will be the first time that a man will be calling you baby

Me: Excuse the hell out of me, what are you talking about?

Ben: Dee, rest o! I know what team you play for, it’s not a secret na.

Now Ben (not real name) is my friend from university and we did NYSC in the same place. So even though I kind of hate his guts, I am kind of stuck with him because he really is a good friend. He lives in Port Harcourt with his brother, and getting a job has been a bit of a challenge for him – a situation that I empathize with and help out where I can. Continue reading

Those Five Things You Should Know About Your Ass

timthumbIt is pretty clear that gay men have major thing for all things anal. Not to rain on anyone’s patootie parade with this piece (originally published on queerty.com), but there are important things about your (second) favorite body part that you need to know so you don’t get any unwanted junk in your trunk.

Queerty spoke to expert fanny physician Elie Schochet, MD, of Ft Lauderdale, who has become a popular go-to man on anal health. And as a straight man who claims to tell gay guys how to use their asses right, here’s some important messages he has imparted.

  1. Respect your sphincter!

Pain is a signal from our body that something is wrong. Yes, anal sex can hurt as you learn to relax, but real pain should never be ignored, no matter how insistent the top might be. Your anus needs to last you a really long time and injuries can mean a lifetime of problems. Continue reading

BEFORE I DIE: 9 (The Doctor’s Appointment 2)

????????????????????????????????????????????????????It is my second doctor’s appointment. I had woken up early, but am just too lazy to leave the bed. Maybe, it’s because I know the hospitals are still on strike, and there is a 50/50 chance my time is just going to be wasted again.

Besides, I’ll be leaving Benue State soon. I have just completed my National Youth service year. I don’t want to go through the process of enrolling for treatment here, and then repeating the whole thing when I return home in Asaba.

I grab my phone to say hello to my twitter followers, and – yes, to observe my dick-pic-watching routine. If you’re lucky, you could even get to see short videos, amateur videos to be precise. I start watching my dick pics, when NEPA brings their yeye light back. That is when I know I am not going anywhere today.

Then, I think about calling Batman, to let her know that I won’t be going to the hospital, before she starts bombarding me with questions. I call over three times, and she doesn’t pick up. Then I call my sister. Continue reading

“We can’t let minorities be pitted against each other.” – Kerry Washington

kerry washington glaad 2015Scandal star Kerry Washington delivered a powerful speech on what it means to be ‘other’, while accepting an award from GLAAD. The actress was honoured with the Vanguard Award at Sunday’s GLAAD Media Awards.

She said: “You would think that those of us kept from our full rights of citizenship would band together, but history tells us we often don’t.

“Women, poor people, people of colour, people with disabilities, immigrants, gay men, lesbians, bisexuals, trans people, intersex people… we have been pitted against each other and made to feel like there are limited seats at the table for those of us who fall into the category of ‘other’.

“As a result, we have become afraid of one another. We compete with one another. We judge one another. Sometimes we betray one another. Sometimes even within our own communities, we designate who is best suited to represent us, and who shouldn’t even be invited to the party.

“As others, we are taught that to be successful we must reject those other others, or we will never really belong.” Continue reading

When Superman Can’t Fit Into His Clothes Any Longer

cavill-steel-1Henry Cavill has built a career on his rather broad shoulders, as is duly noted in a recent interview the Man of Steel did with ShortList. Cavill is discussing his wardrobe and sense of style when talk turns to his celebrated physique as well as his oft-ignored peen of steel.

ShortList: Have your muscles ever ripped anything you’ve owned?

Cavill: [laughs] Yes. Yes they have. Who wrote that question?

ShortList: This is from our online editor.

Henry: Is that a he or a she?

ShortList: He. Continue reading

LOVE AND SEX IN THE CITY (Episode 33)

Blog_Love And Sex In The City 02The eight weeks that followed my coming out to my sister went speedily by, and I didn’t take much note of the passage, because nearly every day was full. It wasn’t long after that first day at the Pan Atlantic University, when I met Oscar, before I was done with my enrolment for the Business School course of Human Resource Management. Earlier on, Dotun had told me of a foreseeable future, when he’d climb up another rung on the corporate ladder of Fit Plus’ management, and because he’d be given the option of a recommendation, he would want me to take up his vacated position. And to be a better candidate, I needed better educational qualifications than my First Degree.

I settled into my renewed schooling with some disgruntlement. My classes were scheduled for Saturdays, and it was with some displeasure that I kissed goodbye all those extra hours I luxuriated in bed on Saturday mornings. Oscar helped some. He had more classes on different days of the week, including Saturdays, and we endeavoured to spend time together during the breaks we got from our lectures. His company was a welcome change from the tedium of my lessons. We got along very well, discovering new characteristics we shared in common; on some level, I realized he was filling a void left gaping by the distance between my friends and I. Our conflicting schedules were starting to get more frequent, and those very precious Sundays I now had left, I spent either lazing at home, or reconnecting with my boyfriend. Continue reading

That Article About The Outrage For The Gays Killed by ISIS

Michael-Lucas-by-Christopher-Logan4This piece, titled ‘Where Is The Outrage For Gays Killed By ISIS?’ and originally published on out.com, was written by Michael Lucas, the creator of Lucas Entertainment, one of the largest studios producing all-male erotica.

He asks: where are the celebrities, LGBT leaders, and progressive politicians who decried Dolce & Gabbana’s slights, yet remain silent over ISIS murders of gay men in the name of Islam?

Read below.

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The backlash against Dolce and Gabbana last week was immediate, brutal, and covered by news outlets from The New York Times to The Advocate to E! Online.

The gay fashion icons had made some decidedly unfashionable remarks about same sex marriage and gay parenting, including “The only family is the traditional one,” along with a reference to “synthetic” children. Continue reading

FROM THE RISING OF THE SUN (Episode 2)

Blog_From The Rising Of The SunAtum was bored, and angry from waiting. He had just entered his chambers when he heard the blast of the welcome trumpet tune meant for prestigious guests. Without thinking, he ran back, as fast as he could to the balcony facing the sun gate to catch a glimpse of his assigned tormentor. In his haste, he stubbed his foot against the solid image of Anubis, an accident which made limp the rest of the way, swearing furiously under his breath.

And finally there he was. And he beheld a gigantic frame astride a massive black horse. He was an imposing figure, steering his horse in an unawed canter through the sun gate, alongside his two escorts and a caravan pulled by four horses. The sight of him and his party projected a sort of dark magnificence, which made Atum wonder if this man was some sort of human reincarnation of some feared god whose birth in the realm of men was a huge relief for the gods above.

Even though it wasn’t a very clear vision from the heights which Atum stood, he could tell that that this stranger wasn’t originally Babylonian, for he seemed a Shebite from afar. Only Shebites had panther skins. Without wasting time or thinking, Atum hurried back into his chambers and struck the medium-sized golden gong which immediately ushered his chief servant into his chambers.

“Prepare me for the guest,” he instructed, “with a touch of Babylon, please.” Continue reading