Dear KD: I Want To Know What I Can Do To Help

blackmentalkingOne of my students was caught having sex with another student while the later was asleep.

A board of inquiry has been set up to investigate the incident and make recommendations. Ironically, I was assigned chairmanship of the board. Evidences have been provided and names of witnesses listed. The accused is seventeen years old, and the son of a special adviser to the state governor. I have started receiving friendly pressures.

One remarkable thing that most members of the board seem to agree upon is that the boy has a right to his sexuality. Surprised? I was too.

Now, I want to look for possible escape routes for that boy, but there are obstacles:

  1. My integrity. I might be accused of collecting bribe from his wealthy family to free him.
  2. The schoolโ€™s manual clearly forbids sexual relationships between students in or outside the school premises. It stipulates expulsion as punishment. Note that this institution is military.
  3. Another studentโ€™s education was terminated some months ago on the accusation of attempted sodomy. He was reported by this same boy โ€“ the one on trial now. A case of a gay guy outing another gay guy. Does he deserve mercy?

I will like to know what to do to affect this situation.

Submitted by Gad

64 thoughts on “Dear KD: I Want To Know What I Can Do To Help

  1. Wow!! Well I don’t know how flexible this Uni might be but I would say follow the school rules as your guideline as much as you can. This after all is someone’s life. Karma though is a bitch for the snitch to be snitched on just saying!!

  2. Biko, follow the School’s manual…
    However, since other members support the Right to Sexuality, please discuss on extending your report to recommendation for review of consensual relationships.

  3. If the boy has a right to his sexuality then why was another student expelled before? What does the rule book say? If the evidence against him is overwhelming then I’m afraid you have to let him go? There is no preferential treatment here, his hand was caught in the cookie jar.
    I went to a military school, I know how stringent the rules can be and it might be time a board is set up to review those rules.

  4. Follow the rules and be fair. U dnt get preferential treatment jst cos ur gay. And in this case its not his sexuality thats in question, its unlawful sexual escapades

  5. Point 3 happened some months back because the school manual has point 2 clearly spelt out.

    Way I see it, there may b no loophole to exploit here.
    If witnesses firmly testify that the deed occurred; guy should b dealt with according to the prescribed school manual.

    What is very important here is that there is a precedence that people will readily point to.

    Don’t burn your hands on anybody’s account.

    This is why occupants living in glass houses are always adviced to desist from throwing stones anyhow.

    If he did not out someone a while back; you may hv been dealing with a novel case and could have applied d perogative of mercy.

    Wat is worse is dat d hunter is now the hunted.

    Sauce for the goose…..

  6. Oh well, well, well…..this is so Emmanuel all over again, snitching only to caught later. Dear Gad follow the rules… wanna break the rules, try not to get caught….the single and most important rule of rule breaking. In this case I support the law biko.

  7. Don’t stick out your neck if the rules are stated clearly, wouldn’t look good on your record and could harm your reputation.

  8. my dear gad. this is Nigeria after all said and done. though people might not like it, but u have a career to consider too. Im all for due process and all, but ehm, the whole situation is skewed away from the side of justice. I would advice that u let him off lightly with some form of punishment.
    look on the bright side though, henceforth, other such cases will have a precedent to be let off equally lightly. just make sure its all nicely documented prim and proper.

  9. that’s nice.
    what was it I said about Queen Karma once before.
    I love her for exacting vengeance when it is most hurtful and when it is most needed.

    The student in question caused someone to be expelled on counts of attempted sodomy. And now he will be expelled on account of actualized sodomy.

    Biko, Gad, just follow the School’s rule book.
    your integrity is at stake here.
    and moreover, it can be very disastrous to get in Karma’s way.
    If she has decreed that the boy will be expelled, and you try to prevent it, she will find other means and you may be negatively affected.

  10. Oh you’re a teacher. I should’ve known.
    How can someone have sex with someone while they’re sleeping!!?? Ya’ll know that’s a lie. Unless he drugged him of course. So besides that, the Lil snitch deserves to be thrown under the bus. I hold no love for snitches.

  11. Gad are you a lecturer at a private university?


    And as for the issue at hand, I am speaking as Dennis! And as Dennis Macaulay that I am I will find a way to kill the case and ensure it dies a natural death.

    I get so defensive when gay people are in sexually instigated trouble and I have a feeling that if it were a boy and a girl the matter may not be that pronounced. I may be wrong though. Me I will kill the case no matter what it costs me.

    This is my opinion

  12. And just how is it possible to have sex with another person in his sleep if he isnt drugged? Sexual arousal is such a powerful emotion, i don’t think anyone can sleep through sexual intercourse …
    On account of this same boy, another student was expelled. I believe he outed the other student out of a deep sense of guilt and self. Loathing. I’d like to say he deserves no mercy and should be shoved firmly under the bus, but then i remember he’s just 17. Am sure most of us can remember the confusion and whirlwind of emotions that come with being in your teens and realising that you’re different – that you’re attracted to men. In the face of all this, i would say on account of his extreme youth, please help cut him some slack as much as you safely can but then he got another student expelled, he knew how harsh the penalty would be and yet he was willing to out another student … for this act alone, be deserves no mercy! Therefore i order that you throw the entire rule book @ him without a single jolt of mercy, he’s not too young learn about karma as well as the need to do unto others as you would have be done to you …. this is my verdict!!
    ****slams gavel, flips golden wig, gathers silk gown carefully about me and walks out carefully ensuring that brand new Louboutin heels are on full display ….

  13. Gad no vex I did not read the story well.
    He got someone expelled? Eziokwu?

    Slam the entire rule book in his face!
    Every body knows how I feel about karma!

  14. Open the rule books and do as stated! #empathizedontsympathize

    Encourage the child’s parents to make him available for necessary counselling,he will learn and be grateful in the future.

  15. I wanted to say temper the rules and rusticate briefly but seeing as Karma is operative here, dude needs to go. The one who was expelled because of his internal homophobia apparently has powerful babalawos in the village …

  16. after reading d last point..all sympathy I had flew out the window. its only fair to have him suspended or expelled; sex in most institutions regardless of whether its btwn the same sex or not is prohibited and there are consequences for those who break the rules. So the just thing here would be to have him face the consequences.. And remember, you are a Christian, so ask you self…would Jesus condone such behavior?

  17. Oga snitched and got someone expelled? The question I would be asking is “what bus do you wanna be thrown under? Is it Ekene, ABC or Chisco?”

  18. Hey Gad, you are right the Jesus I know as well would forgive the accused. It looks to me like the accused has been set up by friends of the guy that was expelled earlier.

    This is my suggestion. Think – “WWOPD?” – “What Would Olivia Pope Do?” The accused family can afford to buy off the witnesses or find something on them that would make them recant their story or not even turn up for the hearing.

    That should get rid of most of the witnesses. For the rest, the accused family can afford an Annalise Keating-esque representative to speak on behalf of the accused during the hearing. S/he would discredit the witnesses and shame them.

    You will rule in favour of the accused because of the lack of evidence or the poor quality of the evidence.

    • Set up is not a likely consideration in this case. He was caught in the act. His sperm was splashed on his victim,s laps and examination by the medical unit confirmed two things. 1. He used his victim,s laps because there was no evidence of penetration. 2. Though he didn’t deny the act when his penis was examined it still has splashes of cum on it.

  19. I must register my appreciation to all who aired there opinions/advise on this unfortunate incident. I was initially @ a loss on how to go about this but you guys came to my rescue. Despite the boy,s wickedness, I still feel obliged to help him out of this but as most of us rightly observed,he is in a tight with no escape route. We will have to find him guilty of breaking the school,s rules by 1. not observing lights out 2. Sharing a bed with another student 3. Sexual involvement with a fellow student. We will recommend expulsion and still suggest he be allowed to come and sit for his final exams when it’s time. With this he can still pursue his life goal,s except a career in the Nigerian armed forces. I must add here that one remarkable thing I noticed so far in this case was that many are now aware of gays and some of the code terms they use especially terms like tb,top,bottom and role. Some are tolerant while many still remain unrepentant homophobes.

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