So, in the past couple of days, I polled several Kitodiariesians with the question: What’s that crazy or fun or silly or slutty or humorous or grave wish you’d like granted to you this Christmas? I got an overwhelming surge of responses, but I only needed a small number for the purpose of this post. And so, I have picked out 16 wishes I’d like to share with y’all – those wishes we want fulfilled this Christmas, here on Kito Diaries.
So, Santa Claus, we’re here, good and naughty alike, and we have a list. Check on it below. 🙂
- Santa Claus, I have been a very naughty boy this year, and boy, was it worth it. That being said, here are the things I want for Christmas. First off, as a proud feminist, I was disappointed to find out that only one male celebrity had his iCloud account hacked this year, and while David McIntosh’s nudes almost made up for the lack of numbers (they were that hot), I want to leave 2014 with a bang. So it seems only fair that to even the playing field, some male celeb nudes should also be leaked. This present isn’t only for me, Santa, but for every girl and gay out there. And here are the celebs I want – Tyson Beckford, Trey Songz, William Levy, Charlie Hunnam, Jack Falahee, Derek Hough, and of course, the almighty Idris Elba. PS: No need for Michael B. Jordan, since I already have what I need.
- A secluded, dreamy beach on an isle… Glorious weather in the day with the occasional rainstorm at night… A dude who is in sync with me… Great internet access… And lots of choice food and chocolate for various purposes.
- I want David McIntosh, twelve bottles of white wine, a bed and a duvet, and a truckload of comedy and horror movies. Oh, and plenty exotic meals too (I mean, we gotta eat sometime… All that energy spent…). And no visitors… In fact, no one goes in or out of the house!
- A nice apartment, with a white Range Sport 2013. Rent paid for five years. Then some exquisite French chocolate and a bottle of French sweet wine to relax the night I move in.
- I want a transgender. A really cute, slim and flexible, smooth-skinned light-complexioned tranny – preferably Asian or Latino, ready to do my bidding at the slightest whim and who is über adventurous.
- Santa, I want a hot, messy massage from a younger, sexy you, wearing thongs, screaming ho-ho-ho while riding me at 12, 000 feet on the sleigh pulled by the magical reindeers.
- I want to have Omari HardPrick – sorry, Hardwick splayed naked under my Christmas tree with nothing on but a Santa’s cap, with an erection coated with chocolate, one which I’ll lick off his tool for breakfast, then him for lunch and dinner during the cold Harmattan nights.
- I want an orgy for Christmas… A house filled with the hottest boys for one weekend. At least, twenty-five neat, healthy boys. There’ll be games, role play… strip poker (I love strip poker)
- A sexy big, fluffy booty, a good face to it and a vacation with the person
- I want a good shag from Keith Carlos. With all my heart, I ask this, Santa.
- I want to find Love. Santa, think you can manage that?
- I want to be able to bring my boo home and tell my parents the truth and have them miraculously understand and give their blessings
- I’ll like world peace and zero attacks between KDtians… OK, Santa, I see you shaking your head in disbelief. Scratch that. I want a happy life filled with all the asses in China and Benedict Cumberbatch waking me up on Christmas morning with nothing else on but a Santa hat.
- I want a sweetheart for Christmas. He doesn’t have to be a perfect 10; a 9 and a half wouldn’t be so bad. Tall, light-skinned, gorgeous, with a booty to die for. Must have a great sense of humour and can hold great conversation. So Santa, since I’ve been a good boy this year, please, fill my stocking with this fine specimen of Nigerian manhood.
All this I want…
And world peace of course 😀
- All I want for Christmas is to wake up and somehow all the oppressive choking homophobia has been sucked out and replaced with tolerance… A country where people judge you based on the content of your character as well as your contributions to humanity and not on the basis of who you choose to have sex with.
- What I want for Christmas, Santa, is for him to say to me the three words I want most to hear, not because he knows I want to hear them, but because he feels them, the exact strength of feelings I feel for him.
So there you have it. Uh, just in case Santa Claus is feeling generous with his gifts, why don’t you tell us what you want for Christmas in the comments section…
Have a Merry Christmas, Kitodiariesians, and a Prosperous New Year ahead of you. – Pink Panther