LOVE AND SEX IN THE CITY (Episode 20)

Blog_Love And Sex In The CityBefore anyone could react further to George’s presence in the room, someone shrieked, “What the fuck is this?!”

We were collectively startled, turning around toward the corridor, facing the guestroom from where the shout had come. There was the sound of a mild scuffle, before the same voice shrieked again, “You’re a bastard, Paschal! How can you do this to me? Is this what I came all the way here for?”

Then we heard the muted rumble of Paschal’s voice as he, no doubt, tried to cajole what seemed to be his enraged sex partner.

“What has he done to the poor boy, I wonder,” Ekene mused out loud.

“Given him piles perhaps?” Jonathan suggested, his lips twitching.

Yinka and Adebola chuckled as Biola said with a faintly cross look, “I hope that drama doesn’t lead to anyone breaking any of my things in there o.”

“Why, Biola, I think you might already be regretting your benevolence,” I gibed.

Our laughter at that was cut short when the guestroom door was banged open, and a young guy stormed out to the corridor, followed closely by Paschal. The boy was of average height, but had an impression of being much taller due to his willowy frame, that skinny body type that is all the rage amongst youngsters in the gaybourhood. He had a small school-bag slung over his shoulder, and his face was contorted with a mixture of anger and misery. While he was already fully-dressed, Paschal was just clad in his boxers and singlet, and trailed after the boy, seeming in no particular hurry to stop him from his headlong departure from the apartment.

“Hey, hey, Andre,” Biola cooed, stretching out his hand to stop the boy from barreling past him as he made for the front door, “what is the problem? What happened in there?”

The boy took a deep breath, looking like he was of the mind to simply shove past Biola without answering him. Then, he dug his hand into his pocket and whipped out a very thin wad of cash, which he brandished in Biola’s face as he began railing, “Your asshole of a friend fucked me from yesterday to today, pounded me relentlessly with that NEPA pole” – he jabbed a finger in the direction of Paschal’s crotch – “he calls a dick, made me sit on it, suck it, deep-throat it, time and time again, because he said he likes me to give it my all. And I did! Because of course, I’m good like that. And he loved it – every moment of what I did in there. And what do I get for it? TWO THOUSAND NAIRA!” He waved the four pieces of five hundred naira notes in his hand in Biola’s face, outrage etched on his face.

“Calm down, Andre –”

“Do you have any idea how much pain I had to endure for his pleasure?” Andre spat out, cutting across Biola’s conciliatory words. “And I don’t even want to talk about how this paltry sum does not even begin to cover my transport fare back to school in Benin, let alone, cover all my expenses that this trip to Lagos has cost me!”

“Did you two talk about him reimbursing you when you get here?” Adebola cut in, drawing Andre’s irate gaze around to focus on him.

“I told that broke-ass nigger” – the boy pointed at Paschal again – “that I wasn’t bucks-ed-up enough to come to Lagos, and he told me not to worry, that I’ll be taken care of. And this” – he brandished the money again – “is supposed to be me getting taken care of? THIS?!”

“Okay, how much do you need?” Biola said, rooting inside his pocket for his wallet.

Paschal immediately interjected, “Biola, you don’t have to –”

“I wasn’t talking to you,” Biola snapped coldly at him, before turning to Andre. “How much will take care of your trip back to Benin?”

“Never mind, Biola,” the younger guy said. “I’ll be fine. I need to learn my lesson from this. I’ve never had to travel out so far to see any runs before. This was a real eye-opener.” And then he turned to face Paschal with an expression filled with such naked dislike, that I found it hard to believe they’d been lovers just moments ago, and he spat at him, “I have played the fool to you this once. It won’t happen again, because I will never forget this. I will never! Remember that.”

And he whirled around and stomped past Biola, wrenched the front door open and slammed it shut behind him in a punctuation of his declaration.

There was a bit of a pause in the wake of his departure, which was broken when Ekene said, “You fucked up, Paschal, you know that, right?”

“Abeg, abeg, don’t get on my case now,” he returned curtly.

“He’s right,” Adebola said. “Clearly, you led him to believe that he didn’t have anything to worry about concerning his expenses, and yet, you didn’t hold up your own end of the deal.”

“You make it sound like all this was a business deal,” Paschal growled. “And that Andre is a prostitute.”

“It is a business deal!” Biola interjected cuttingly. “And Andre prostituted himself to you. When you invite someone from another state to come and see you, for sex, the understanding is that you fuck him, you pay for his time. You know, for someone who gets paid for sex, you just said one of the most clueless things I’ve ever heard.”

“Or perhaps, he was just being clever, and feels like he’s played a fast one on the poor boy,” I added.

“I beg your pardon,” Paschal said, oscillating his glare toward me.

I stared back at him. Like the others, I didn’t approve of how he’d played this Andre boy, and I wasn’t going to be cowed from telling him my mind. “You heard me. I think you know what you did. And I think you’d always known that this is what you’d do. Lure the boy over here, fuck him, and then give him what you can, and let him go to hell. Thing is, you forget that gay guys can be more vindictive than even scorned women. He told you to remember what you’ve done, that sounded like a threat to me.”

“Oh please…” He waved a dismissive hand in the air. “What can he do? He’s a mere student in UniBen. He should come here and try nonsense, I’ll crush him. Lagos is my city.” And before anyone could utter a rebuttal, he turned to George and said with a bright smile, “Well, look who’s here! George Emoefe, what, in the devil’s nuts, are you doing back here, away from Sunday School?”

92 thoughts on “LOVE AND SEX IN THE CITY (Episode 20)

  1. Pascal is just big asshole. I used to like him before but now, I detest him. Most passionately.
    And it’s appalling that many guys do the very same thing, breeding unnecessary ill will between others and themselves.

  2. Hmmn! The greatest insult u would ever give me after hanging out or hooking up wit u is to give me MONEY! Hellooooooooo *flips weave*! Am not a whore, I planned my expenses b4 coming over nd dat would b like paying me off! I could ask u 4 money when I need it but definitely not after a hook up, IT MAKES ME LOOK CHEAP!
    Dat said, both Pascal nd Andre r big fools! Why?
    1. Who goes on a hookup wit money in mind! R u a whore?
    2. Who gives somebody dat came 4rm afar off dat amount after such hard labour? Make him trek?!
    And Declan should pls shut it b4 Pascal go open him nyash 4 everybody! #BiolaToTheRescue.

  3. Now I am totally against paying for sex in any kind. However if they had an agreement before coming, they you should be a gentleman and keep up your end of the bargain or decline before he comes.

    I also think if you are asking a student who doesn’t have any income to leave his town and come and see you, atleast provide a stipend for transportation. Its the decent thing to do.

    • If an agreement was reached, no wahala although it still screams cheap to me! But I have an issue wit dis Lagos to Jo’burg just 4 sex oooooooo! A relationship? Yes! But just 4 sex sounds stupid! D odds r not even worth it! If my getting sex means I would travel to lag 4rm Abj, I wud stuff my booty wit butt plug nd continue my year long celibacy! Being horny won’t kill u but accident, kito nd angry mobs would.

  4. Pinky, now this is averyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy good read, but short too. George has been making his entrance for how long now and we’ve not known why he came, E good?…More to come by Wednesday abeg

  5. I was gonna respond to what kryss had to say with a few points and Dennis just mentioned some. If you hAve an agreement with someone keep to your end of the bargain.
    And i was kinda of the idea that taking money makes you look cheap in the past but when you are a student and you cannot afford to make a trip and someone keeps inviting you for sex how come you can’t accept money afterwards.
    It is not being cheap, only thing is the invited person should still make effort to go prepared so as not to be stranded in the event of any eventuality.

    • Not just a student but even pipo working should have the simple courtesy of HAVING their OWN money before jetting out to any place…just for their own INTEGRITY sake and might I add…even if the person agreed to foot your bills. but something ave learnt is that sometimes it was ASSUMED that the person would pay just because he is inviting you!!! Don’t assume get his ASSENT on the footing of the bills biko before you let yourself and all you r about down! #myhalfcent

  6. So nobody noticed how Pascal called the dude a prostitute whereas he himself sleeps with men for money? And we didn’t notice Declan trying to quote that sexist line from Shakespeare about women scorned? *Burning feminist boxers this morning.*

  7. Pinky bet why na???? Is this the trailer for the full episode coming later in the day? Mbok eyeneka this is too short. Am not interested in this their drama with the cameo appearance of Andrea. (Meanwhile y do most runs guys always use that name? *Packs my 1 million braid into a pony tail*) I am however, interested in the grand entrance of the guest star George! So Pinky Darling, we are waiting for the full episode. Kisses. Abasi odiong fi ooo!!!

  8. Never been a fan of the idea of getting paid for sex… Even if you are to travel for a hook up and u are promised tfare always av ur own money because when the sex is over the guy most times wudnt see d need to give u such amount.

  9. This may not be a popular opinion, but gay or not, older or younger, buttom or top, at the end of the day we are all MEN!!!! Men are generally perceived as go getters, bread winners, and what ve you! I just feel like dropping dead when I hear Guys expecting “Cab money” whenever they are invited out for a date or sex. Oga u mean to. Tell me there are no dicks in ur state? Sex is a mutual thing. We meet, we agree to fuck, we fucked end of story! All these idea of always trying to replicate the settings of heterosexual relationship in ours in just mind numbing for me. You are a man, man the fuckup and quite waiting around for ppl to carry ur weight. That’s how you lose value son. Even straight guys who ve jobs and are doing well are swerviing the so called “I never chop” chicks. I agree to a dates when I know my wallet and ATM is on standby, and expect the other party to do the same. I no de for falling hand matter
    #Teammutualnavigation
    *drops mic and exit stage

    • Though I agree that no one should depend fully on another in any intimate union, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with helping a “less-privileged” sex-partner (eg, students, job-seekers) out with “transport-fare” if u invited him to ur house (and if he’s been a good boy) even after he told u he didn’t have cab-fare. Anybody that feels he deserves cab-fare should mention it b4 coming sha, and anybody that doesn’t like to give out cab-fare should state so clearly b4 allowing someone come over.

    • I like to be considerate! If I ask a student who depends solely on an allowance from his parents to come from say Nsukka to PH to see me, I should be a gentle and provide a stipend to cover his transport costs to and fro. Its a good thing to do. However if I ask someone who actually has a job to come around, then that is a different dynamic.

      What I have an issue with is actually paying someone for sex! I had an old friend over recently and he needed some company. So I called this guy I used to know way back in uniport to come and “chill” with us and he sent a text saying we’d give him 5k. I was livid ofcourse and wanted to cancel but my friend went ahead with it. This is the one I am against because it’s paying for sex which to me is a No No!

      Why pay anyway when loads of boys are willing and ready to give you for free?
      Just saying

  10. Paschal is a mess for coercing a student (who already told him he couldn’t afford d trip) into leaving skool and and another city, on d premise of a promise to cover his expenses…
    But that Andre is a bit of a drama-queen,isn’t he?(“I have played d fool for u…I will NEVER forget this…NEVEEEERRR!!!”) Lol…I can’t.

  11. Wats most painful to Andre here isn’t realy abt d cash but its d feeling of being used!
    Dats d worst feeling eva.
    He hd it all planned out,he didn’t evn feel any remorse.
    D many pple karma will use to stack fire wood for hell fire ehn,Na only God know.

    • I have a problem with bottoms feeling “used”. The sex was engaged in by two people actually! How does one party feel used and left?

      There are bottoms you also have sex with and after that one time they “dump” you! Remember my karma story?

      We are buying into male/female archetypes with gusto and it’s really not cool!

      • No lies detected dennis!
        We had consensual sex! Nobody used anybody end of story. Hell am still sprungged out bottom I thought I had an all night blast with and he never looked in my direction ever again! At 1st I felt used but after rolling around in self pity, I came to my senses and told myself that am just not what he wants. So we need to squash this “used me” ideology

  12. Okay.. So I have a theory that keeps me in check anytime I travel to see someone, Gay or straight.

    THE VEX MONEY THEORY.

    Oh yes. This theory has being saving my butt since 1900.
    According to my personalized-dictionary-definition,
    “Its when you go out of town to see a friend/partner/relative/quick shag with your own money either in your pocket or in your account with the sole aim of not expecting a dime from him/her even when you’re rest assured that you’ll be sorted”

    This saves you unnecessary stress of he-go-pay-he-no-go-pay.
    Plus
    It keeps your intergrity intact and raises the bar that you’re capable of taking care of yourself. And in the gaydom, classy.

    But then again, when will gays grow up and stop demeaning themselves by asking for money before or after a shag? Its appalling. I know fingers are not equal. But make efforts to keep it clean, classy and not messed-up.

  13. All of you sitting on a high horse sha!

    Ofcourse I aaked for transportation while I was in school and going to see often older bottoms. Yes I asked for transportation and when they gave more than that, yes I accepted!

    Judge NUT

  14. I don’t think I’ve seen anyone bristle up to the fact that pascal gets paid for sex too.. It has been stated before this episode but no one said anything. But Andre shows up and the story is different.

    Who wants a healthy serving of double standards?

    And who fucking cares if a person has sex for money. Is it your money? Is it you prostituting yourself. We get it! You will never ever do it but not everyone can get an actual job or money from parents and stuff like that. This has nothing to do if your a man or woman. It’s a matter of what you’re willing to do to get money…

    I also don’t see anything wrong with Andre. A deal was struck but pascal was trying to be clever.. I would react the same way if I were in his shoes.

    • Pascal is a hoe! Andre is just an unfortunate lad. The point we are all trying to make is charging ppl for sex comes across as …………….low(don’t want to use anything offensive since almost everyone has been there done that). I Had a french pilot that I was seeing earlier on in the year and he just couldn’t get pass saying how nigerian boys see him as a cash cow and would bill him like crazy. It was difficult moving forward cos he thot everyone is the same. Even when I got over myself and eventually went on a date with him, he kept droping hints to ve an idea how much I charge. It took the grace of God to stay calm and not empty my glass of beer on him. Its sad! If am hooking up with a student? That is understandable, I will definately shift grounds but a grown ass man? Make him go sell purewater then we can take it from there
      #thatsjustme I never reach the level where I go de do sara, dem still de feed me too

      • But can you blame the pilot when all your naija bros b4 u came decided he was their mugu Maga wey don pay!!

    • I don’t have anything against people who fuck for money, but you should let all your partners know that you are doing it, so they know what they risk. I only have sex with men I know well. I’ll ask all manner of questions so I can make an informed decision.

  15. And u knw sometimes we r d architects of our own kito stories!
    Some pple never rest till dey get vengeance
    N vengeance isn’t often clad in black like we’d expect.sometimes it chooses purple and gold
    Dt boy gave Paschal a promise
    Bt Paschal in his broke pride n glory shook it off.
    Bottomline-we r neva gonna c d end to bad tales happening in d gaybourhood.
    If we all treated every1 as ‘family’ maybe and jst maybe tins could tilt to d better side.

  16. Peak you and your very strong opinions. Dennis has made a much more valid point. If someone invited me over for sex in lagos and i wanted to go, I’d definitely
    make arrangements for my transportation and wouldn’t expect anything from you but say you invite me to ibadan and we agreed that you pay for my t.fare, i expect you to do just that. But i’d be sensible enough to go with more than enough money. That man up shit is really tired.

  17. Ah pinkie all these shades u re throwing en *cleans tears* oh lawd f all d names 2 use it had 2 b myname *andre* nd my city benin nd my school uniben and my skinny frame lol *oh lawd* *breaks down in tear* dennis where @ thou? Defend ur sweeries honour *winks*

  18. *sprinkles holy water from SCOAN on Absalom nd Sticklysly* Y’all need Jesus in ur life! Lol! Don’t spoil Brian biko! Meat na by force? He only asked 4 rice cos he is a vegetarian, Right Brian?

  19. PP, this was a good read!

    First of all, it’s important to state that EVERYONE has collected transport money at some point in their lives. The one I don’t get is when someone comes to visit and you guys roll around (very satisfactorily I might add) in the hay, you have the mindset that he’s cool, and next thing it’s time to go but he keeps delaying; then you ask “Aren’t you leaving?” and then he goes “T fare Na!”……is it a right? Where in the laws of tb-dom is it written that t fare (or more) is a compulsory follow-up to any tryst? I don’t get it.

    Students (or dependents as the case may be), please if you’re going to see someone, whether inter or intra-state, and you expect any financial benefits from the hangout, let it be established that you expect so and so amount, so there won’t be any surprises when you don’t even get up to half of your expectations.

    Older ones…haba! Do you have to be told? As long as you’re a Nigerian youth, you know what it feels like to be a student or unemployed person. Even though you’re no one’s cash cow, being nice to the young ‘uns never hurt anyone.

    At the same time, if person no get….he no get….no be by force! Lol!

  20. Stating the bonds of agreement is all well and good, but please, let’s not overdramatize the issue here. When you INVITE someone from another city to yours to come for some good ole fun, do you seriously expect heaven not to punish you when you act surprised at the request of money from the person you INVITED? For heavenssakes, you asked him over. From one location to another. Even if the other dude doesn’t ask you in succinct terms, only a dunce will act like he doesn’t know there has to be some sort of remuneration at the end of everything. It is sheer common sense. All y’all who are coming here, mouthing off about how it is wrong for a dude you invited from another place to yours should not expect anything, in my opinion, are simply rationalizing that moment of stinginess when you’re satisfied and can no longer be bothered with the other dude.

    In some cases, he doesn’t have to tell you. You simply should know. If you asked him to leave Port Harcourt to come to your place in Abuja, you are responsible for him in all ramifications. Anything short of that is callousness.

    • Hold on Dubem! If I, as a man with a job invited a student all the way from another state to where I am, haba! I have to do what’s right….no questions asked!

      But it’s not when that student’s hostel is at your backyard and he comes to see you when he gets an itch down there that needs to be scratched, then when he comes, he expects me to shell out thousands for one round of satisfactory sex on both sides? No siree

      As for overdramatising the issue, I doubt that this issue can be dramatised enough. The young ones take a lot for granted and need it drummed into their heads.

  21. Ok…. I see so many comments about paying for sex being more outrageous than wearing a pink tutu and walking the streets of Lagos, but the point here is dis…. ‘ A deal is a deal’… If you made a promise to foot some1 else’s expenses, in exchange of your pleasure…. Dude, pay up.!!.. This is way beyond the issue of being a hoe, or not… Even regular businesses don’t run on such ethics…

  22. hey pinky i saw wat you did there o….it was not enough that the young chap came from Uniben you had to name him after my beloved…….wia is Illumua? please would you kindly sue pinky off his tiara for(a lawyer should help pls)!!!! I never read the story sha….going back to read it………certain it will be interesting as always.

  23. Pingback: LOVE AND SEX IN THE CITY (Episode 21) | kitodiaries

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