HIS KITO STORY (EDITION 5)

200019237-001Hi, I’m Woody, and I have a kito story to tell.

My story is the kind you don’t wish on your friends, and sometimes, not even your enemies. It’s a chapter of my life that I’ve been trying very hard to forget, the kind of story that I swore never to recount, especially not on a forum such as this. It took a lot of courage on my part and encouragement from Pink Panther for me to let this story be told here.

It started from a visit my family and I once made to the village a long while back.

The trip was for the burial of an aunt, and at some period during the time, I lost my phone. I’d plugged it to charge in our living room, and several moments later, I returned to find it gone. There were lots of questions asked, investigation done, but that had been a very rowdy period, with people thronging about everywhere in the premises. So the pool of potential suspects was vast. Continue reading

JAIL THE DEVILS, THEY SAID

Here’s something CeeCee wrote during the period that the Nigerian anti-gay bill was signed into law, and the furor this kicked up. Have a read, and let us know your thoughts.

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JAIL THE DEVILSothers 15

It’s been some time now, and one subject has been on the lips of a large swathe of the Nigerian population. Everyone has an opinion on this subject, everyone is eager to thrust forth his opinion strongly, especially if they happen to hold identical views with the majority of the populace. President Goodluck Jonathan signed the same – sex marriage prohibition bill into law, the bill had previously made its way through Nigeria’s upper and lower legislative houses, all the while egged on by the Nigerian populace at the behest of various religious bodies. I shall not bother to go into the minute details of this law as it is safe to assume that you the reader must by now have critically examined this obnoxious piece of legislation. Continue reading

Love And Sex In The City (Episode 7)

FOREWORD: The first part of what I have to say is unrelated to the story below. I just want to quickly say how much I appreciate every contributor who sends write-ups for the maintenance of this blog. I can’t be grateful enough. However, I have recently gotten curt emails from a couple of contributors, expressing their displeasure with me for not instantly putting up their pieces after receiving them. They were also of the opinion that because I didn’t respond to their emails after I received their materials, I must not think them good enough. And then, they rounded up by instructing me not to bother publishing their articles.

Both suppositions are wrong. First of all, if I think a piece does not measure up, THAT IS WHEN I WILL respond with an email, informing the contributor of what I think is wrong. If I do not reply, it can only mean one thing. That I have read, approved, edited and drafted the write-up for future publication. Secondly, with the exception of ‘Love And Sex In The City’, ‘James’ Journal’ and ‘Bunkside Frenzy’ which are episodic and have to be published every week, every other write-up gets in a line. There are only seven days in a week, and a lot more articles than that. I urge my contributors to be a lot more patient and understanding. Everybody wants to be heard, and that is the medium this blog provides. That objective has not changed.

The second part of what I have to say is about this episode of Love And Sex In The City. This episode was inspired by a conversation I observed and participated recently in with a group of acquaintances. It is a conversation of sorts, expressing a difference in opinions concerning one of the random issues plaguing the Nigerian gay community. So after reading, it would be nice for you to express your own opinion in the comments section, so we can all learn and understand the varying views. Thank You. 🙂

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Edited“KIZITO KISSED YOU?!” Yinka hollered, staring at me like I’d just told him that I was invited to the Aso Villa for a sexual orgy.

I shrugged, and before I could respond, Adebola intoned, “What’s the big deal about that? Straight guys kiss gay guys all the time.”

Yinka turned to him. “Maybe it happens to you all the time –”

“It does happen to me all the time,” Adebola preened.

“But how many times,” Yinka barreled on, “have you gotten hot and heavy with two different straight guys in the space of one month, eh?”

Adebola had nothing to say to that. Continue reading

JAMES’ JOURNAL (Entry 5)

Blog_KD JournalJune 20

I’ve got a crack on the screen of my Note 3…one long, slightly-curved crack scarring my precious phone. The funniest part is that I dreamt about something like that happening the night before it happened. I should have gone to meet a babalawo to provide protection for the phone.

I tried searching for phone insurance in Nigeria. We don’t have that…

School has resumed for a while now… Continue reading

Must-See Video: Men In Heels Murder Beyonce Montage

0212beyonce3It’s no secret that Queen Bey is an inspiration to dancers everywhere with YouTube amateurs to dance troupes doing flash mobs in her honor. Fresh off her announcement for her return to HBO for a mini-series “BeyonceX10”, a video went viral of a trio of men in heels under Yanis Marshall Choreography not only killing a montage of Beyoncé hits, but doing the autopsy.

Seriously, these boys bring it. Check out the footage below:

Let’s Discuss . . . About How Gay You Are

Blog_Let's DiscussA fellow Kito-Diaries-ian sent me a message recently on BBM. Apparently, he’d forwarded some posts of Kito Diaries to a guy he knows to catch up on his reading, and this friend replied him with the following admonishment:

‘Biko, I’m not that gay o. I just do this for fun and I’m going to stop soon and go fully into girls.’

Then he continued with:

‘I hope you do girls o. Make sure you swing that way sometimes so you don’t lose touch with females. As for me, I’m not really into the gay life, I just dabble in it sometimes.’

Priceless response, isn’t it? Makes me think of Jonathan in my Love And Sex In The City series.

Apparently, being homosexual is like sipping a cocktail. You only get a glass every now and then. You can always decide to stop drinking it and switch to beer. This tendency some gay people have for ‘selective sexuality’ baffles me often times; I’m not sure I quite understand how one can decide which gender he or she fancies, and for how long that attraction will last. Perhaps it’s my naïveté talking. And so, that’s why I’ve brought this up here.

So, let’s discuss . . . about how gay anyone can be?

Too Hot To Be A Criminal?

Pictures2Four people were arrested and four guns were seized in an Operation Ceasefire sweep in Stockton’s Weston Ranch area Wednesday. Police say a recent uptick in crime in that area led to search warrants being served at 11 different locations.

Officers arrested 30-year-old Jeremy Meeks, 22-year-old Terry Bailey, 18-year-old Jurzi Coleman and 44-year-old Joelin Coleman, all on felony weapon charges. The four guns seized were two rifles, a handgun and a shotgun.

Since this story has aired, Jeremy Meeks’ mug shot has gotten a lot of online attention from people more concerned about his looks than his crimes. Continue reading

Love And Sex In The City (Episode 6)

EditedIt’d been two days since that disastrous evening (well, for me), two days since I last interacted with Bryson and Paschal. I refused to pick Paschal’s calls, and, it was only by the grace of God that I’d not already deleted him from my BBM contact list. But with the rate at which he was going with all the pings he’d been sending my way, despite my steadfast unresponsiveness, my patience was starting to wear thin.

But Paschal wasn’t on my mind at all this early Friday morning as I trekked the short distance from the bus stop to my workplace. It was very early, a few minutes past 6am. I’d left my house earlier than usual because I couldn’t bear to be around all the anxiety and long faces that filled the place. Continue reading

And Now We’re Equivalent To Agents Of Mammy Water. Lol

28gevisser-articleLargeA friend drew my attention to this ridiculous article written by an insignificant Nollywood director named Ugezu J. Ugezu. The piece reads like a trashy string-up of words put together to do nothing but fan the already raging flames of hate the Nigerian society has for folks like you and I. It even has a dramatic (Oh Nollywood *shakingmyhead*) title – ‘Just In Case You Are Not Gay And You Desire Never To Become One, Then You Need To Read This.’ Catchy, no? Lol.

Well, the piece is below. Read and have a good laugh at its entire ridiculousness.

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Just in case you are not gay, and you genuinely desire never to become one someday, then you need to read this. Continue reading

BETTER SAFE THAN SORRY

safe sex ThailandHe lives in Abuja…I stay in Lagos. We met on a generic gay dating site.  He had an elusive profile and I had a picture of my bum on mine. The first thing I noticed was his age: 38. Older men have always appealed to me; (my first boyfriend was 45) and so we exchanged numbers and began chatting.

Our conversations were sexual, I would send him a picture of my bum in the middle of the day often unawares while he was at work, and he would send me one of his dick later that evening (which didn’t look too impressive to me). I should mention he was cute, in a cartoony way; He reminded me of Chicken Little. He was also married.

He had an ass fetish, and liked his men a bit on the chubby side, and so my pictures sent him on edge. He would literally call me at odd hours and go on and on about them. He had a nice Hausa accent, so I didn’t mind.

One day he told me he was in Lagos and wanted me to spend the night with him. It was a rainy night and was quite late. He was leaving for Abuja the following day, we had been chatting for a while now and had talked ourselves up to a frenzied anticipation. And so I went, in a taxi he would be paying for, apprehensive but expectant. The road was free, the night crisp and clear, the air cool and humid. Continue reading